Tuesday, 2 March 2010

The Perfect Day

It was the perfect day to dump a body. Steel grey sky. Mist poured heavy from the heavens and fogged thicker at the feet. Rain lashed and speared flesh. All this worked in our favour. Today, people would stay inside. They'd seek the warmth of the fire. The closeness of the kettle and stove. The distraction of the TV. Of course, that wouldn't include the work crowd. But we had a plan for that. I thought of everything. He doesn't do much. He just stands there looking pretty. Even that's pretty hard.

The clock read 9.25. Peeping between the rags we call curtains, I checked that everything was in place. Car 10 yards away. Check. Keys in pocket. Check. Body wrapped in black sack tied with rope. Check. I ticked them off my list with a red ballpoint pen.

At the door, the wind sliced me with its frosted knife and I watched with watery eyes as he dragged the body up the basement stairs. The neck snapped as the head hit every step and I wondered why I had to do everything my damn self. 9.29. Rope burned its twisted pattern into my palms and, for the second day in a row, they were red. I shrugged and set foot outside.

My breath was heavy and the rain pricked the sack covered body. Our feet squelched mud and, soon, his face was smudged with the stuff- brown dirt speckled and smeared over his blue jean arse. I wanted to laugh but some part of me crawled out from within and took over. My cheeks fell.

I fished for the car keys and pressed the button. The lights flashed orange and he yanked the boot open, wiping and flicking the rain from his face with fevered hands. I let it run off me, rivulets down my eyes, drops hanging to a point from my nose. I breathed in the lung-harsh air and blew out white.

It took four swings to get it in. We whacked the head on the brake light and it cracked. I cursed him- thoughts of the Police pulling us over. The ice couldn't get any thinner. Boot shut, I climbed in. He sat in the driver's seat, hand hovered over the ignition. I smacked him with the cup of my palm and we jolted to a start.

At the edge of town, the hedges filtered out and the dirt track moulded into solid road. The wipers squeaked blunt blades across the dirty screen. An army of black umbrellas poked their pointed ends to blame an ashen sky. Mail was posted. Dogs were walked. Feet hurried. My cheeks rose and a jolly tune filled my head and forced itself out between my lips.

The car slowed to a pedestrian pace and I turned to him, hand cupped and ready. His eyes flitted between the road and the rear-view mirror. He was a dog's whimper and I turned. The sack rose up from the uncovered boot and rustled as air was sucked in and out from the shrivelled dead lungs inside.

I had not thought of everything.


  1. Nice and dark. Good stuff, Lou.

  2. uh oh. perfect day turned into a nightmare. eery and funny. now what?

  3. Haha - quality ending. Some really great writing in there. More please.
    Love the fact I don't know what I'm going to get when I come to your blog.
    Ooh and I see you're on 199 - congrats in advance on the 200. Most deserved.
    *Read about my dating disasters at plentymorefishoutofwater*

  4. This is great. Dark and twisted. Keep 'em coming.

  5. Thanks for the comments. I'm surprised i got any response really- not one of my best posts. But i'm really struggling to be inspired at the moment. Really struggling. Hopefully be back with something better soon.

    Sarah: I have no idea what's next. Who knows? I think i prefer it just as it is. Flash fiction doesn't always need a concrete ending. Well, that's what i'm telling myself!

    Fish: Thanks! I've been hovering around the 190 mark for a while now- if i ever get to 200 i'd be amazed! :)

  6. Lou, cool. Dark, warped, and chilling. I love it. What a great read. Keep 'em coming. Such a fantastic ending. I want more. Really.

    Lou thanks for your visit to my blog on Wednesday. I so appreciate your words so very much. I am so glad to have you as a friend. Happy weekend. =)

  7. Melissa: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

    Robyn: You're more than welcome for the visit. I'm pleased you liked this piece. A bit different from what i usually do and i'm quite pleased with the ending, the more i read it. I like the open-ending-ness of it (is that even a word/phrase? Who knows!)



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